Confessions of a bad feminist
Accountability....
Why does no one in this damn world take accountability?
You know who should start?
You.
*Society* is always used as a scapegoat for all terrible inequalities of our world. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but you, me and every other person in this world is our society.
We all contribute to the toxicity that the patriarchy is encompassed with.
It’s no secret that women have always been seen in an oppressive manner, it's only in newer times though, that we have begun trying to eradicate patriarchy. We are finally persevering towards the elimination of male dominance in social systems, which had already been enforced through our zeitgeists of male superiority.
How exactly are we tackling this movement? It's important to first understand how the lack of education on what women can do, is effecting the feminist movement.
“Man up”,
“You hit like a girl”,
Sexist comments are always thrown around as little jokes or in this day and age used as memes. If you’ve heard these lines before in their many different variations, but never did anything once it was said, then you have contributed to the continuing struggle of societies attack on Females.
Confession #1 of a bad feminist;
Whether you say it or just merely heard the indifference in passing, then ladies and gentlemen we have the first step to world scale blatant sexism.
Confession #2 of a bad feminist;
Cattiness amongst girls. Bitch, Slut, Whore: these are all words that I hear in everyday conversations with YOUNG GIRLS. Through this we achieve nothing, but giving other men an excuse to use this language towards us as well.
How we treat each other, reflects on how we allow ourselves to be perceived in society.
Confession #3 of a bad feminist;
Is a polite man opening a door for you really a violation of your human rights? What about the fact that HIStory should be HERstory?
Is this genuinely keeping you up at night?
How do we expect to be taken seriously with the actual rights violations, when at the same time we also complain about these ridiculous ’issues’? We need to be more dignified in what we are actually fighting for and how we act towards these certain things.
My problem is where the line needs to be drawn in terms of what rights we fight for. I see though, how this can happen, when there's hardly any education on the topic at all.
Let's see what we've missed.
Feminists explore the reasoning behind the exploitation of women, which has been defined as gender inequality (as a social standpoint within a sexist culture) and class inequality (as economic status in a capitalist society).
While feminism is advocating for a global act of freedom, there are two significant approaches to how we tackle this change, which are liberal and critical feminism.
Liberal feminists purely insist on the freedom of women. Liberals push for the removal of legal obstacles which will allow for women to overcome subordination. The main legal obstacles that liberal feminists are advocating against are; freedom from violence and threat. Which is forcibly making women do what others want or diminishing a woman's ability for personal activities, which is a complete violation of a woman's dignity. This includes many different laws in all countries around the world.
Also ‘Being free of the limits set by patriarchal paternalistic and moralistic laws:’ The act of morally forbidding a woman to choose certain options in life, on the assumption and clarification that it is in the women's interest. An example is laws prohibiting the act of prostitution or abortion. Women's choices are seen by liberals as something that should be guided by personal values and self-interest.
In Singapore and India, if non-consensual sex happens within a marriage (which could involve girls as young as 13) it’s not a criminal offence. In Jordan and Lebanon, a child has to have a father from either of those countries in order to be granted citizenship. There are 46 countries which don't have laws protecting women against domestic violence, unless they experience grievous bodily harm.
These issues don't just remain within underdeveloped walls, many developed countries experience this as well. Up until Monday 5th of August 2019, New Zealand still criminalised abortions, unless you went through 2 doctor certified examinations and was under 20 weeks pregnant.
While laws in place obviously create massive roadblocks, critical feminists argue that actually challenging the hegemonic masculinity of dominant societies, will accomplish more for women's rights. Sure at first, it seems like just noise, but genuine activism gets attention, which allows for further developments.
Critical theorists see the deep-rooted patriarchy we have and state that, by tackling law alone, it won't be overthrown. Diversity is something often forgotten when advocating feminism, ‘Women’ can become vastly generalised. We are all oppressed by the same patriarchy but placement in society, class, and race all have a detrimental effect on many different women. As a feminist, you should advocate for all women, if you don’t, you're just as bad those misogynists.
Just advocating in elitist protests or just eliminating the law, does not bring these women justice, which is an important factor to account for. Change has accumulated for women of the western world, but this is not to say our job is done. Critical theory of feminism gives a more emotional connection between activists and the cause, which allows for passion to take over. We are not stopped by the limits that taking down law has.
There is more capability for genuine change and entire societal shift, through actual activism.
A reflection of an elitist protest benefitting only those within high paying jobs is “A day without women”. On the 8th of March 2017, females took to the streets, in protest of Donald Trump's election to support those who he had left behind in society. While on the surface, women of all societies came together, it was still a money battle.
The main aspects of the day were striking work and refusing to spend money. Those who couldn't make it to this rally, were those of course, working in the lower half of society who need the pay. Corporations sadly didn't grind to a halt with the absence of women in the workplace for a day. They struggled on and sure it was hard, but they did it. What did this protest actually achieve other than the possibility of closing the gender pay gap?
I understand, I am young and female, it is extremely difficult growing up in a man’s world. When it comes to the fight for equal pay, I believe it's inappropriate when a man and a woman who have the exact same qualifications, work ethic and experience are being paid differently. In most of those cases, women are only met with 80% of what the man would be paid, which obviously isn't right. But what value does materialistic money give to you? It's not stopping your ability to live because where we see these pay gaps is occurring at CEO positions or high paying jobs, which already pay very well.
There are women who work 3 jobs just to put food on the table for their family. Teachers and nurses are underpaid too, the living wage compared to earning wage is affecting everyone in the bottom classes of society. If we look at Marxist capitalism there's only been a significant increase in the top 1% of working class society salary. Where the average salary for them in 1982 was $176,800 which has now inflated to $336,900. Whereas the middle working class of New Zealand has seen next to no change going from $28,900 to $34,400. Money will never be fair under any circumstances because there'd be no richest of the rich without the poorest of the poor.
‘A day without women’ definitely doesn't account for or support those in Iran, Iraq, Sudan and Syria who are mutilated and oppressed because of their gender.
Who is thinking of the 200 Million women and girls currently alive that have experienced ‘Female genital mutilation’. Mainly performed on girls aged infant to 15, men cut out external parts of vaginas and alter them for no medical reason whatsoever. This further oppresses women in over 30 African, Asian and Middle Eastern countries.
You don't advocate for the girls as little as 10 who are sex trafficked from Tenancingo right through to New York. These underage girls face 30 rapes a day, 7 days a week. They are photographed, beaten and permanently scarred beyond repair. With no homes to go back to, the majority of these girls remain in the cycle of prostitution once they’re of age. Who’s protecting them?
What does “A day without Women” do for those 1 in 3 women, who at some point in their life suffers from sexual violence.
That's right, they get lumped into the victim pool and blamed for a situation that had been completely out of their hands.
A day without women… ladies who can afford to ditch work for the day, while yes are fighting for equal rights, aren't out there being activists for those women whose everyday lives are unbearably painful. These are the situations that need our everyday support.
290 million women everyday live without their fundamental human rights and every day is a day without these women.
Written by Tayla-Lee Bainbridge
